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As human beings, we all have feelings of aggression in us. But, as adults, we know how to control our behaviour and manage the aggression. However, a child doesn’t understand how to channelize their aggressive behaviour. Hence, they start to indulge in activities like hitting, biting, kicking etc. As a parent of the child, it becomes a duty, to make the child understand how to express these behaviours in a positive manner.

Thus, below are few tips for parents who have an aggressive child:

Set Limits:

One of the most important factors is setting rules and limits. It’s always a good option to set the limits for a child and let all who take care of the child know about these limits. If the child indulges in kicking or biting, they should understand that this behaviour is wrong along with why this behaviour is wrong.

Different Channels to Express:

A child doesn’t know how to deal with anger. Hence, it is our duty to make them understand about different ways of expression. Anger can be expressed through words; this message needs to be conveyed. Also, the positive behaviour of the child should be praised. They should be exposed to environments where they see a fight being resolved peacefully.

Teach about Self Control:

A child doesn’t know or even understand about self-control. The parent should teach the child about self-control. Through a parent, the child can easily modulate their feelings and understand about self-control. Hence, through self-control, they will understand to think before they act.

Don’t encourage Toughness:

Many families, especially for the boy child, encourage the “tough” behaviour. Hence, the child starts to act violently and indulge in kicking and biting to win their parent’s approval.

Don’t Hit the Child:

Most importantly, don’t hit the child. Many parents start hitting their child because they feel that it will correct their behaviour. Instead, the child learns from this behaviour and understands that it’s ok to act violently towards others if they don’t like their behaviour. Hence, avoid corporal punishment under any circumstances.

Control Yourself:

Usually, children learn from parents. If you can’t control your own aggressive behaviour then they will also be not able to. Hence, it is important for you to express your anger in reasonable ways.

Aggression in children is an expression of self, and the parents should understand what they are trying to say through their anger. But sometimes, their anger seems uncontrollable. In those cases, it is advisable to visit  child psychologist to understand the child’s behaviour.

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We have all heard the term psychopaths in TV shows or movies. When the word springs up, our first association is always towards which is something outside. It’s not wrong in thinking that psychopaths are serial killers, but along with it, there is a possibility that we are living with one. Psychopathology is a series mental health illness and needs immediate treatment.

But, how do we identify a psychopath?

Thus, below are few signs shown by a psychopath:

Manipulative:

They are highly manipulative. They will appear as charming and loving individuals, who can please anyone when they want. This charming sense of self is not genuine but to their liking. Many people can’t identify the manipulative behavior, hence fall for them.

Impulsive:

Psychopaths are prone to impulsiveness. They generally appear to be calm and composed but have impulsive tendencies. If the certain idea of shoplifting seems exciting to them, they will indulge in the act. Their sense of impulsiveness can also range from torture to serial killings.

No Empathy:

Most importantly, they aren’t empathetic at all. They can’t understand others feelings and are highly egoistic. Everything they do must be from their own liking and perspective. They don’t consider yours or anyone else’s feelings. In their mind, what they are doing is perfectly fine.

Dishonest:

They can easily lie, without blinking their eyes. It is not necessary that they will lie to get out of a situation. They will lie because they feel a certain excitement when people start believing in their lie. They find it enjoyable when people start believing them.

Prone to Violence:

These people are very violent. Their violent behavior is not triggered by any specific agent. Hence, they do not get violent when they are in a rage, but they become violent in a very calculated manner. Their violent release is from torturing or inflicting pain to animal or people.

Shallowness:

Psychopaths are very shallow people. They don’t let anyone enter their inner self, and hence they come across as cold people. Thus, they will and can make stories about their lives and in detail to just maintain the shallowness.

High Level of Intelligence:

The level of intelligence they have is very high. Intelligence doesn’t mean that they are academically good, but they pick up things very easily. Also, to portray themselves superior, they will use terms which are not common for the layman.

Arrogant:

Along with the high level of intelligence, they are very arrogant. They have a very high level of self-esteem. Which makes them think that they can never be caught for their misdeeds. Their high self-esteem can also be seen as a delusion of grandeur.

No Understanding of Morality:

Like many of us, they do not distinguish between right or wrong. Which then makes them torture animals. By doing this, they start exploring the boundaries of right and wrong.  Also, if they are “told” something is wrong, and someone does the wrong, then the right way to correct them is through torture.

Lack of Guilt:

Psychopaths do not feel guilty about their actions. For them, humans and animals are objects to play with. They do not feel any kind of remorse for their activities. Hence, they will not take responsibility for their actions.

If someone you know is showing these signs and symptoms, then please visit a mental health professional immediately.

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Holi, the festival of colors, is just around the corner. It channelizes our emotions and expresses our feelings through colors. The place becomes an expression of rainbows, and we enjoy spraying colors and water on each other. Playing Holi itself becomes an enjoyable event.

Thus, below are few of the psychological benefits of playing Holi:

Colours Bring Emotions:

Playing with different bright colors brings our emotions outside. It brings a certain kind of liveliness in our lives. Also, it influences our behavior and the feeling of joy represented by colors, outside is reflected inside.

Colours and relation to Brain:

When we see bright colors, it becomes a catalyst. The brain is fed with happy emotions. Bright colors represent our inner brightness and happiness, thus making us happier.

Food as Happiness:

During the Holi season, we make and serve a lot of sweets. Sweets add to our emotions and feelings, making a person feel happy. There is always a relationship between good carbs and mood, hence consumption of sweets releases happy chemicals in our brain. Good food makes a person be more relaxed and keep them in a good mood.

Social Gatherings:

During this season, we are meeting with our friends and families. Meeting and playing with our friends creates an environment of opening up. The social gatherings bring out joy and playfulness in us. Thus, making this season more enjoyable.

A lot of Exercises:

We all know doing exercise keeps the body healthy and the mind at peace. During this festive season, there is a lot of running, jumping, falling etc, which counts as a lot of exercises. All this exercise keeps you fresh and active, which in general keeps the body and mind healthy. Also, when your body is tired, a good sleep after all the activity makes you ready for next morning.

Holi is a season of joy and harmony. Dr. Prerna Kohli wishes everyone a Happy and prosperous Holi. In this season, play, have fun and be careful. Stay happy and enjoy!

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We can’t always send out positive e-mails. Sometimes, we send negative e-mails also it is necessary to be harsh, to send out feedbacks. It may be an email to an employee or an investor. Where you want to lay off someone or disagree with someone. Hence, it becomes a necessity.

We all know that even simple words over a phone conversation can be misinterpreted. Thus, sending out a negative email can cause immense anxiety to the person who is receiving the mail. A person who is already suffering from a mental health issue might lose days of sleep.

Hence below is the “how to” guide on sending a negative e-mail:

Something Friendly:

Once you are done with the salutation, it’s always good to start with something friendly. It will create a conservative tone and intrigue a conversation. It can be; “How are you?”, “How was your weekend?” etc.

Thanking:

Even if you are laying off someone, you should thank them for their work. A simple “Thank You” can ease up the mind make the person feel appreciated for the work they have done. Directly dwelling on what is wrong in their work can make any person feel anxious.

Something Positive:

It might feel like going around in circles, but it is important. The person must have done something positive throughout their tenure. Hence, it is important that you point out their strengths and boost up their positive sentiment. It then eases up the conversation and keeps them calm while reading the rest of the e-mail.

The Body:

In the body of the e-mail, you can present your criticism, or feedback, or laying off. But, along with it, you should mention the reason, and how the person can correct these for future purposes. Simply writing that you are “fired” or “I disagree”, will make the person feel unappreciated. Thus, it is important that along with the feedback, you should present your thinking.

Avoid making direct comments, instead, try to elaborate on things. It’s better to limit yourself to things which can point out the detailed instructions. If the person is being laid off for various reasons, it’s better to give in bullet points, and along with it give the reason. If you do this, then the person will feel appreciated and feel valued.

Ending:

Always end with asking if you can clarify anything or any doubts. It sends out a positive message that you care about the person. It brings a closure to the email and also it sends out the message to the person that you are willing to listen to them. If you just end with the criticism, it will leave a negative impact on the person.

Then end the email with a nice sign-off. Which can be, “Best Regards”, “All the Best for Your Future”, etc.

Sending:

There is a right time for sending out any kind of email. If you start sending out emails in the middle of the night, then it can cause anxiety and panic. It’s better to send the email in the morning when the person has woken up. It gives a message of consideration and makes it easier for the person to process.

Following the above simple method, can make it easier to send out negative emails. Thus, making it better for the person to process and accept the feedback.

If you need Psychologist click here

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Clicking selfies is a new form of art in today’s generation. Every selfie should get a like on all the social media platforms. It gives an outlook to where the person is, and what the person is doing. It also presents the person how he or she is looking.

But, in recent studies, it is shown that clicking selfies has become an addiction. Not so long ago, there was news, where the person who was clicking selfies fell down a gorge and died. Recently it has become an obsessive addiction.

A person clicking numerous selfies in a day might be suffering from selfie addiction.

Hence, below are few signs of selfie addiction:

Low Self-Esteem:

One of the major indications of selfie addiction is a child’s low self-esteem. Through selfie’s the person is trying to gain admiration from outside. The clicking and uploading of the photo and then waiting for the approval gives an indication to them. They crave for people’s likeability.

An obsession of Appearance:

Accepting how one looks is admirable. But, people who are constantly obsessed with how they look becomes damaging. Most of the people who have this addiction often spend most of the time how they look. They spend extra hours and effort towards their appearance. Hence, when they click or post the selfie, they start to feel admired of their appearance.

Sudden Mood Changes:

A person who is a selfie addict will start showing sudden mood changes when they are not allowed to click selfies. These mood changes can range from extreme rage to extreme sadness. In some cases, the person starts feeling depressed. Also, they start showing personality changes, if they are being bullied online.

Large Photo-Library:

One of the most obvious signs of selfie addiction is a large selfie portfolio. The person’s gallery is filled with selfie’s. Their gallery will be filled with thousands of selfies. Thus, it becomes one of the biggest signs of selfie addiction.

If you think your child or someone you know is suffering from selfie addiction, then the best way is to talk to them. Talking to them actually helps to the problem. If you still see that the person is not improving then please visit a professional for advice.

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As the board exams, the competitive exams come close, the level of stress increases. Students try to sleep but, there is a lack of sleep. Sometimes, the stress becomes too much which causes a lot of anxiety. Even though there is a need for certain levels of stress, too much or too low of anything is bad. here we talk about some tips to Handle Pre Exam Stress.

Hence, below are few tips on how to handle Pre-Exam- Stress:

Start Early:

The early bird gets the worm. Similarly, starting to study early reduces the level of stress. Even though it is a difficult task for many students to start early, but it is one of the best ways to beat the stress.

Time-Table:

Organizing yourself is one of the best things one can do. Thus, maintaining a timetable will help you to be focused. Also, it will help you determine your long-term and short-term goals. It gives you an overview on how to do things while helping you focus.

Talking About it:

Sometimes, the stress and anxiety get out of hand. In this situation, it is best to talk to someone. Talking about it not only reduces stress but, it also helps you distinguish between rational and irrational thoughts.

Visualization:

The power of visualization helps. If you focus and visualize towards your success, it will help you relax. Visualization helps in boosting one’s confidence. Also, it helps in reducing stress. If you are focused on your vision, it boosts your confidence.

Don’t Forget to Relax:

It’s very important to keep relaxation in your time-table. Relaxing techniques and proper sleep helps the mind to remove the extra stress. It reduces the levels of anxiety and helps the person to focus. Relaxation works as a rejuvenating agent.

Don’t Depend on Caffeine:

Many students and even adults rely on caffeine too much. They actually take a lot of caffeine too keep themselves awake. But, in reality, the caffeine doesn’t help them in remembering. It increases the mental stimulus which then can result in extreme levels of anxiety.

Practice:

Lastly, as the old saying goes, ‘practice makes a man perfect’. Similarly, it’s very important to practice every day. Practicing everyday will help you remember, as well as relax. So, when you sit for your paper, you are actually focused and relaxed.

Conclusion

In conclusion, the stress created by exams is more external than internal. But, if you follow these tips, they can actually help you fight pre-exam stress. But, if you or someone you know is showing extreme amounts of stress or anxiety, then please visit a professional near you.

To Learn more about Dr. Prerna Kohli

If you need Psychologist counselling click here

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Losing someone who is dear to you, be it a friend or family member, is a very traumatizing experience. People suffering from depression, leave all hope in their life and find suicide the last option. But, the problem arises when they express this to their family member or friend. The person who is approached doesn’t actually know how to address this situation. There is a genuine worry in them but, they can’t address the worry.

A mental health professional or volunteers at suicide helpline knows what to say or do. But, they are not available for them 24 hours.

Hence, below are few things you can do to help them:

Show Concern:

It’s very important to show genuine concern for their situation. But, in these cases, you need to show and express your concern about them. Expressing your concern to them will let them know that you are there for them.

Ask them:

Many people don’t ask the person because they think they will instigate the situation. But, it’s very important to ask them. One should ask how they have planned to do it, or how they are thinking about it or what time, etc. Asking them about it, will not instigate the situation, rather will give them an outlet to speak.

Don’t Argue:

Usually, the first instinct of ours is an argument. We tell them that “there is so many good” or “think about your family” etc. But, these things are perceived as an attack. Instead of arguing or giving reasons to them, be with them and care for them. Let them know, that they are not alone.

Take Professional Help:

In these cases, professional help is very important. If the person is going to a psychiatrist or a psychologist, then urge them to contact them. If not, then take them to a mental health professional. It’s very important for them to know that they have different kinds of support.

Don’t Leave Them Alone:

Most importantly, don’t leave them alone. This is the time they are feeling lonely and vulnerable. In their time of need, you should not leave them alone.

Listen to them:

Lastly, it’s very important for you to listen to them. Just listening to them empathetically and without judgment helps them a lot. Hence, patiently listen to them and understand their feelings and emotions.

It becomes a matter of great grief if we lose someone like this. Hence, if you or someone you know is suicidal; then please visit a psychologist nearby. Also, please share this blog as it can help a friend or family member helping their loved ones.

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More than 60% people in India suffer from depression. Depression is a very common disease among all the age groups. Empathetically speaking, a person suffering from depression feels very lonely and sad. But, the illness itself doesn’t live in the vacuum. It creates an effect which affects all the people who are near and dear them. How to overcome Depression?

The fear of judgment makes them feel closed up. It leaves the family members in a confusion and they don’t actually understand what is happening. Communication with the person who is suffering from depression becomes very difficult.

Ways to Help Your Friend or Family Member

Thus, the question arises, how can we help our friend or family member. Below are few ways to help them:

Educate Yourself:

It’s very important to educate yourself about the illness your friend is suffering from. It might be very difficult for you to cure them, but it will be easier if you understand their situation. Educating yourself on their situation will help you cope up with their moods, and generate patience within you.

Ask Questions:

Most of the times, a person suffering from depression will never come and tell you what they are feeling. They always have a fear of being judged or criticised for their emotions. To know and understand their position, it’s better to ask them. But, remember to ask the questions empathetically. Below are few questions you can ask them:

• When did it start?
• Do you think there is a situation which triggered it? What was the situation?
• Are you having suicidal thoughts?
• What is it that still makes you feel happy?
• Is there a situation where you feel worse?

Helping them Identify the Stressor:

Depression will always be accompanied by stress. Hence, identifying the stressor will help them and you understand their situation very well. When a person is suffering from stress, they are not able to think very well. Hence, the situation seems more complex to them. Thus, by identifying the stressor you can help them try and reduce them.

Taking Outside Help:

No matter what illness someone is suffering from professional help is always required. You should encourage your friend or family member to take professional help in curing their illness. It’s the stigma and the fear of judgment which stops someone from taking professional help. Hence, you should encourage them to break the stigma and take the help required.

Enhance their Strengths:

A person who is suffering from depression will always feel that they are not worthy. They feel like they have lost all their strength and hope in their life. Hence, it becomes your responsibility to remind them of their strengths. You need to remind them that they are incredibly strong while facing this situation. It’s always good to boost their confidence by showing them their achievements.

Be with them and Let them know it will go away:

One of the basic things you can do is to be with them. Hence, by being with them you can make them laugh. And as we all know, laughter is the best medicine. No matter what joke, or stand-up comedy, or funny movie you watch together, it’s always good to laugh. By doing this, they will know that you are there for them and are trying to make them feel better.

Also, a person suffering from depression feels like they can never get out of it. Hence, only one sentence can give them a lot of strength. All you have to say and remind them is, “it will pass away, and you won’t always feel the same way”.

Listen to them:

Most importantly, just listen to them. Listening to them without any judgment or criticism will help them a long way. Empathetic listening is one of the most important ways to let them know you are there for them. Also, it is the most important way to help your friend or family member.

Conclusion

Remember, a professional will only spend a bit of time with the person. But, no one knows them better than you. Hence, supporting them in their time of need is very important. It’s you who spends the maximum amount of time with them.

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In today’s time, the emphasis on body image and skin color has increased. We see gyms opening up in every corner, and advertisement focusing on making the skin fairer. Everywhere we see, we are told that our body is not perfect or our skin should be fairer. The constant bombardment of these adverts can make anyone feel insecure about themselves. Hence, leading to different mental health issues like bulimia or anorexia, or depression. But here we give you advice how you accepting yourself.

It’s very important for anyone to learn to accept their body. The fight between the body and self becomes daunting for the person. The acceptance towards one’s body is fogged under the illusion of looking better. Big companies promote themselves by attacking one’s self-image. A lot of teenagers and even adults lose their self-confidence.

Thus, below are ways to understand and accept the self-image:

Making the Decision:

It’s very important to take the first step and make the decision. Positive thinking should be the first step. Along with it, it is important to understand that you are beautiful no matter how you look. Telling yourself every day that you are beautiful the way you are, helps you. Thus, making a decision for the acceptance of the body is the first step. The positive thoughts delete the negative ones which are fed to us for ages.

Dressing for Yourself:

We always have a tendency to dress for others. When going to a party our first thought is what would XYZ think when they look at us. In between those thoughts, one forgets to dress for themselves. We always tend to think that we will look good in the dress if we shed some weight or gain some muscles or look a shade whiter. But, we forget that we have to dress for ourselves. Wearing the dress, you are saving for the future will boost your confidence. It will help you improve your confidence.

Accept the Compliments:

We have reduced some weight, or cut our hair or etc. Then, someone compliments on the thing. Our tendency is always to find the negative in the compliment or dismiss the compliment. We console ourselves by saying that we are being humble, but in reality, we are not accepting the compliment. Hence, it is important to accept the compliment. It’s ok if someone is complimenting on your progress or on yourself, you should accept it.

Being Positive:

In the run of improving our body image or our insecurities and jealousy; we tend to bad mouth the other person. We feel negative, that’s why we tend to see the negative in others. It becomes very difficult for us to give a compliment to someone. Thus, it is important for you to compliment others. It brings positivity and acceptance towards yourself. Giving out compliments to others will make you feel happy and confident.

Conclusion

Hence, as mentioned above, most people live for the future. They enter a vicious circle of going to the future rather than living in the present. Thus, it is important to live in the present. Also, know that we have to fight a long period of negativity, hence it will take time to accept. But, it is possible to accept yourself and be happy.

If you Need Psychologist click here

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