BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

Understanding the role of forgiveness in a successful marriage

A marriage is a legally accepted union between two individuals, which often entails a commitment to a long-term relationship and the sharing of finances, duties, and emotional support. It is a social and cultural institution that exists in many different forms and can be based on various factors such as love, family, religion, or tradition. Many advantages, such as companionship, financial security, and legal protection, might come from a marriage. It is often seen as a way to build a family and create a stable home environment, although not all marriages involve children.

Marriage can also come with challenges, such as communication difficulties, conflicts over finances or household responsibilities, and changes in personal or professional goals. Nonetheless, many couples can create enduring relationships with open and honest communication, respect for one another, and a desire to overcome obstacles.

  1. Communication is key:

Successful relationships between married couples depend on effective interpersonal communication. People need to make sure that they communicate openly and honestly about their feelings, needs, and expectations. It is crucial to understand that communication is a two-way process, so being a good listener and taking the time to absorb what your partner wants to convey is necessary. All relationships have ups and downs, but healthy communication conflicts can be dealt better. Good communication, both verbal and non-verbal provides a base for understanding. Couples should learn to understand each other, not defeat each other. They should talk using the future and present tense, not bring up past events or mistakes. Instead, have healthy discussions to resolve issues by talking and figuring out the solution.

  1. Respect:

Mutual respect is crucial for a happy and healthy marriage. Couples should treat each other with empathy, consideration and kindness and avoid criticizing their opinions and feelings. Treating each other respectfully and not complaining, considering their point of view is vital. Respecting your partner’s independence is also important. Couples should not discuss their problems publicly but rather solve their concerns in their personal space to be respectful to their partners. For instance, if a partner is going through some disturbance and starts being rude, it is advisable that the other partner respect their emotions and not reciprocate them.

  1. Spend quality time together:

Spending quality time together can strengthen a married couple’s bond and create long-lasting memories. It is simple to get caught up in the daily grind and forget to spend quality time with your partner when you have a busy schedule and demanding lifestyle. Make an effort to routinely schedule time for one another, even if it is only for a little while each day. Take trips, enjoy dates, and spend time with each other. It is also advisable to indulge in each other’s areas of interest to make them feel loved and respected.

  1. Practice forgiveness:

In the practice of forgiveness, it is essential to understand each other’s perspective and be mindful of the pain and hurt. The address of the past will prevent the grievances from hampering the present and future of their relationship. On the other hand, this will only be possible when they communicate openly and empathize together for one another. It is not easy to develop, but with time, patience and practice one can cultivate it in their relationship. It will help them strengthen their bond and foster the depths of their commitment and love for each other.

  1. Maintain a healthy sex life:

Practicing sex in a relationship is crucial for overall well-being and health. Research suggests that increased sexual activity helps boost cardiovascular health, strengthen immune system function and reduce the stress generated. On the other hand, it helps release endorphins and generates a sense of intimacy in a relationship. It also helps the couple develop a physical and emotional connection, which further helps them understand and explore each other’s desires and derive pleasure and satisfaction appropriately in their relationship.

  1. Prioritize trust:

Trust allows couples to feel secure and comfortable with each other, fostering emotional intimacy and vulnerability. Without trust, a relationship can become weak and susceptible to falling apart. By prioritizing honesty, consistency, and reliability, couples can build and maintain a strong foundation of trust, allowing them to feel secure and comfortable with each other, fostering emotional intimacy and vulnerability, and deepening their love and commitment towards each other.

  1. Be supportive:

Support has many forms, such as during challenges, success, hearing one another’s ideas and concerns and being happy and supportive of their partner’s growth and development. Not only in happy times but being supportive during each other’s difficult times helps us understand the realness of the relationship. When the couple overcomes all the hurdles together no matter what and how they are, this helps strengthen their love, respect and admiration for each other on a deeper level. This way relationships can last longer.

  1. Practice empathy:

Truthfully, every relationship has its ups and downs, problems, fights and disagreements, but what matters at the end of the day is how we handle the situation at hand. In trying times, listening to our partners attentively and empathetically is vital. One should try to put themselves in their partner’s position and understand the scenario without jumping to conclusions. It will allow you to understand your partner better and provide them with relief and satisfaction when they feel they are heard. Lastly, there must be honesty in the dialogue as it demonstrates sincerity, trust and respect.

  1. Personal space:

Be considerate of your partner’s needs for privacy and individual interests. Allow each other to pursue hobbies, friendships, and other activities outside the marriage. It reduces the constant pressure of chasing happiness in marriage; rather, two happy individuals may come along to share their joy and celebrate together. When people are content as separate individuals, being happy together comes organically. At the same time, it puts the principle of detachment into play to a certain degree, due to which partners can support each other through tough times without being shaken by it to the same degree as their better halves.

  1. Seek professional help when needed:

If one struggles with some marital issues that one cannot resolve by themselves, seeking professional help might be of service. While you attempt to strengthen your relationship, advice and assistance can be obtained from a counselor or therapist. Sometimes, even the healthiest marriages can benefit from professional help. If you are struggling with communication, trust issues, or other challenges, seek the assistance of a counselor or therapist. They can offer resources and techniques to help improve your relationship and overcome challenges.

In conclusion, work and commitment are indispensable to creating and maintaining a happy marriage, but the benefits are tremendous. You can develop a long-lasting and satisfying connection with your partner by working as a team, showing appreciation, and practicing efficient communication.

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

The impact of stress on relationships and how to manage it

Are you facing difficulty in your relationship? Do you feel disappointed with your partner and wish to quit? If so, you might just be experiencing stress in your relationship.

Stress in relationships can be seen when certain concerns arise between partners due to differences of opinion. Similarly, stress can be caused due to individual issues related to one’s work, past relationships, childhood experiences, etc. Thus, stress on an individual level can also lead to affect the relationship. These concerns and issues are not easy to anticipate. At times, it becomes difficult to resolve the stress as the people involved are not aware of how it originated. Moreover, your response to your partner’s stressful times can also determine how the relationship is impacted. To overcome the challenges that come along due to stress in your life it is essential to acknowledge the reason behind the stress and work towards effective management.

Stress is a common factor in relationships and can have a detrimental effect on both partners. It can lead to communication problems, misinterpretations, intense conflicts, lack of intimacy and empathy, unhealthy coping mechanisms, difficulty managing finances, and fatigue. When one or both partners are overwhelmed with stress, it can be hard to feel close to each other, and also exhausting to enjoy doing activities together. Stress leads to changes in behavior, such as being less aware of own actions, words, and tone of voice, which can negatively affect relationships. Furthermore, individuals may bottle up their stress, making it difficult for their partners to recognize what they are going through and how to provide support. It is crucial to identify the signs of stress in relationships and to address it healthily. Research implies that relationships are worse off when people are under stress, so it is important to identify methods to help manage it.

  1. Focus on the things you like in your partner and appreciate them instead of worrying about the negatives.
  2. Avoid overthinking and over analyzing as it takes the joy and peace out of today.
  3. Replaying and reliving the past hurt and building unrealistic expectations can bring about a lot of unhealthy behavior in the relationship. Practicing mindfulness and shifting the attention to what you are feeling, seeing, smelling, hearing, tasting, and writing it.
  4. Healthy relationships involve accepting your partner as they are and not wanting to change them. It is important to set healthy boundaries and not ponder on things that are not under your control.
  5. Rekindling the things you once enjoyed doing together can help you focus on things you love about each other.
  6. Take hope, be kind, and communicate effectively. Not every conversation may go as you expect but be sure to talk respectfully throughout.

Harmonizing differences in a relationship is a bit challenging, but finding a sweet spot and bouncing forward can help rediscover the best in each other.

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

Navigating Cultural Differences in a Cross-Cultural Relationship

Cross-cultural relationships can be a wonderful opportunity to learn from and grow with someone from a different cultural background. Nevertheless, these challenges are exclusive and can create tension in the relationship if not dealt with appropriately. Our need to get to know and comprehend one another is inherent in a relationship. Assisting each other in understanding what defines them promotes self-awareness and mutual respect. And yet, when it comes to intercultural and interreligious relationships, there are several complexities to be mindful of.

Couples from different cultures and religions need to be aware of their beliefs, values, and presumptions, along with the conventional relationship requirements of trust, care, respect, understanding, resilience, and acceptance. To avoid potential conflicts, it is essential to comprehend the distinctions among various cultures and religions. The probability of dysfunctional unions can increase if one or both partners are uninterested in or unaware of interfaith or cultural differences.

With that being said, we as humans are always capable of finding meaningful relationships in this world, regardless of our varied cultures. Navigating through these cultural differences becomes key to the beautiful sustenance of long-term cross-cultural relationships. The three main pillars of this can be mutual respect, understanding, and communication.

Below are a few suggestions for managing cultural disparities in an intercultural relationship:

  1. Communicate openly
  2. Being open and honest about each other’s feelings helps in understanding the partner’s perspective.
  3. Learn about your partner’s culture.
  4. Being open-minded and having a decent level of curiosity fosters a willingness to learn about the person’s culture.
  5. Values and beliefs
  6. Finding common ground can help navigate differences, as one can use that as a starting point for building a relationship with their partner.
  7. Healthy Growth
  8. Building a healthy relationship is a slow process. If a person is too quick to always “correct” their partner, then both people in the relationship will lose interest in making any kind of adjustment. People generally tend to stand by their culture, as it is an integral part of who they are. Being patient with each other can help in the long run.
  9. Celebrate your differences
  10. Respectfully accepting diverse cultural beliefs is vital, as it can lead to disagreements about sensitive topics like religion or politics. Rather than trying to impose one’s perspective, understanding, and respectful disagreement can be fruitful in maintaining cordial relationships.

In conclusion, navigating cultural differences in a cross-cultural relationship requires patience, understanding, and empathy for each other’s cultural background. By building a strong foundation of respect and communication, you can create a relationship that celebrates both of your unique backgrounds and cultures. It’s important to communicate openly, respect each other’s values and beliefs, and support each other’s sense of identity and belonging. With patience and an open mind, a cross-cultural relationship can be a beautiful and rewarding experience.

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

THE IMPORTANCE OF HEALTHY COMMUNICATION IN A RELATIONSHIP

Long-lasting relationships require effective communication. Even in the midst of a conflict, people are more likely to establish common ground if they employ constructive communication techniques. The relationship may get stronger as a result over time. Healthy communication has a relatively very positive impact on any relationship. Here are just a handful of the numerous reasons why talking to your significant other is so crucial:

Enhances Mutual Respect

The introduction of respect is one reason why questions like “Why is communication important in a relationship?” may be answered.

When one partner does not respect the other, it can lead to a breakdown in the relationship. We all have our preferred methods of establishing authority, and it’s important for our significant others to have accurate information about these preferences.

What one person finds perfectly respectful could be completely insulting to the other. Therefore, it is crucial to communicate well so that both sides are aware of where to draw the line.

Generates Trust

Trust in a relationship is earned through time, and one way to do so is through open dialogue.

Building trust takes time and requires both parties to be open to and receptive to one another’s points of view and opinions.

Your ability to trust your spouse will increase when you talk to them about your problems and share personal details.

You can trust your partner more when you are able to talk to them openly and honestly. You have come to trust them through time, and as a result, you feel confident sharing your most private information with them.

Reduce Conflicts

When two people in a relationship have different perspectives on a problem, it’s no wonder that tensions arise.

Fights and anger are inevitable in a relationship when neither partner feels heard or understood.

Unfortunately, in the absence of conversation, neither party will be able to pinpoint the cause of the rift, making a peaceful resolution impossible.

When people in a relationship are able to express their feelings and listen to those of their partner, they are better able to understand each other and work through their differences.

Reduces Guesswork

A relationship can fail if there is a lot of guesswork involved, as both partners are likely to make mistakes that will annoy the other.

When there is an open dialogue between partners, there is no room for speculation. It would also aid in the development of a healthy connection, one in which neither partner has difficulty identifying what the other values.

Your relationship will be simpler and more fulfilling as a result.

Setting Realistic Expectations

Relationship expectations matter and should be talked about. Positive expectations foster relationship growth. There are issues when we are unsure of what is expected of us. Distress results from relationship expectations not being realized. Each has distinct goals for the future. It’s crucial to establish these expectations early on in any relationship to prevent one person from unintentionally upsetting the other. One can experience a healthy, happy, and fulfilling relationship once expectations are mutually stated. The capacity to negotiate tough situations collectively can be maintained by having clear expectations.

Understanding each other’s psyche

With time, we might be able to learn more about the relationship and others’ motivations if we communicate our views and feelings openly and resolve conflicts with them. We can discover more about their mental processes, requirements, priorities, and likes and dislikes. Without this understanding of their emotional processes and character traits, we might attribute their actions to something that isn’t true.

Enhances emotional stability

When people have healthy relationships, they are more emotionally stable. This makes the communication more genuine and the relationship more secure and might make the individual feel confident about it. In conclusion, every relationship has its ups and downs, but if both parties are committed to maintaining an open line of communication, they will be more equipped to work through disagreements and grow closer over time.

We need to communicate clearly to avoid misunderstandings that may cause hurt, anger, resentment, or confusion.

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

How to rebuild trust after a breach in marriage?

One of the pillars of marriage is trust. Breach of trust in the marriage can be in the form of deception, or broken promises, and can damage the trust between the partners severely.

There are numerous ways in which a partner can violate the trust which is as follows:

  1. when a partner is emotionally or physically unavailable.
  2. Incapability of partner to take key decisions about the family.
  3. Insufficiency of partners to keep their significant other’s concerns into consideration.
  4. Unfaithfulness and lying continuously to their partner.

As a consequence, it creates insecurities, doubtfulness, and anxiety between the partners. However, this does not mean that relationship cannot be retrieved. Even though the process of rebuilding trust can be tedious, with proper couple counseling and the willingness of both partners, the trust can be restored.

Ways of rebuilding trust:

Rebuilding a romantic relationship can be challenging, but using Gottman’s method can be a helpful tool in improving communication and providing a roadmap for couples to navigate their way back to a fulfilling partnership. This method is a popular approach to repairing and strengthening romantic relationships. Let us look at the key principles of the approach.

The first step is to establish a “love map,”  which involves getting to know your partner deeper by asking open-ended questions and actively listening to their responses. This helps build intimacy and trust. It’s important to build a culture of appreciation and fondness by expressing gratitude for each other’s positive qualities to counterbalance the negative feelings that may have developed over time.

Next, focus on enhancing your communication skills. This involves practicing active listening and expressing your needs and emotions clearly, and being careful to validate each other’s feelings, expressing empathy and understanding, and avoiding negative communication patterns such as criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.

Couples can work on deepening their emotional connection through shared experiences and meaningful conversations.

Gottman’s method also emphasizes the importance of managing conflict in a healthy way, by using communication techniques and finding solutions that meet both partners’ needs. This includes identifying and addressing underlying issues, taking responsibility for your behavior, and seeking compromise rather than trying to “win” arguments.

Finally, it’s important to nurture your friendship and fondness for each other. Spend quality time together, show appreciation and affection and work on building positive memories.

Rebuilding a romantic relationship using Gottman’s method requires commitment, patience, and a willingness to work together toward a common goal.

When to approach counseling?

The restoration of trust in the relationship after a breach takes a lot of commitment, time and indispensable efforts towards the partner just to start a conversation around forgiveness.

Now, the question arises if all of these don’t work in your case because perhaps you and your partner are too overwhelmed to start a conversation about the betrayal, what shall you do? At this point, couples counseling is recommended. Couple counseling is effective when both partners are open to constructive communication. In couple counseling a counselor or a psychologist works as a neutral point of contact who can facilitate the recovery and bring the unsaid questions and answers to the surface of the communication. They work as a guide who can help the couple to decipher an action plan around  communication, trust, compassion, and understanding in the relationship. They help the couple to make well-informed settlements about whether to fill the gaps in trust and move ahead together or apart. They further help in strengthening, understanding, and healing the couple, also as individuals.

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

7 More Relationship Tips

In continuation to the previous article, here are seven more tips that will help improve your relationship with your partner or Significant Other (SO).

It isn’t you against your partner, but you and your partner against the problem:

Each time a situation arises, instead of making it an issue with your partner, you need to come together to fight the situation as a team.

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips
Dr. Prerna Kohli, India’s Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips

Important Discussion need a face-to-face discussions:

Never discuss something important over a chat message. Ideally these discussions should be had in person, or at the minimum over a phone call. Never on a WhatsApp chat.

Arguments can be Healthy:

Every time you have an argument with your partner, it is an opportunity to learn something new about them. It is a way to become closer to each other.

It’ not your job to make them happy:

Many times people in a relationship thing it is their job to make their partner happy. In this attempt they reduce themselves to being a doormat. The relationship is equal. Each party is entitled to be happy.

Right or Happy? The choice is yours:

Do you want to win each argument, is it more important to you to be right each time or is it important to be happy. Happiness beats right any day.

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips
Dr. Prerna Kohli, India’s Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips

Great Relationships don’t just happen:

When you see other couples who have a great relationship, believe that all of effort has gone into it. Great relationships need nurturing and hard work.

Personal Growth:

The most important thing that you and your partner can give each other is space and time for personal growth. You may be a couple, you may believe that you are soul mates. You still need to give each other room for growth.

Just a little bit of effort from both partners can make your relationship healthy and strong. Together as a team you much stronger to face the challenges of life.

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All images courtesy Pixabay

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

7 Relationship Tips

Married or in a relationship, you will face issues with your Significant Other (SO). Here are seven issues that most couples face and the best way to tackle them.

As a couple you are maturing:

The relationship that you had a few weeks ago, a few months ago or a few years ago is no longer the relationship that you have today. With each passing day, your relationship matures and changes. You need to appreciate that change is inevitable and continue to love each other regardless.

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips
Dr. Prerna Kohli, India’s Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips

Address issues when they occur:

Don’t allow issues to fester but address them as and when they occur. If it bothers you that he doesn’t put down the toilet seat, or it bothers you that she doesn’t screw on the cap on the toothpaste tube then you need to talk about these issues. Address the issues when they happen instead of piling them up.

Use “I” instead of “you” when you have a disagreement:

Every healthy relationship will have disagreements, but for the argument to be healthy use “I” instead of you. So instead of saying “you were mean to me” say “I was hurt when you said that”.

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips
Dr. Prerna Kohli, India’s Top Psychologist Share Relationship Tips

You have to be the change that you want to see in a relationship:

As Gandhi Ji said “be the change you want to see in the world”, in this case in your relationship. You can’t control their behavior but you can control your own.

Relationships are not always equal:

There is a belief that for a relationship to be successful it has to be fifty-fifty. There will be occasions when your partner needs you 100%, be there for them. Remember this is temporary only.

Be open:

Couples often play the passive-aggressive role. They don’t express their feels, needs or desires and then are upset when their needs are not fulfilled. Be expressive about what you need.

You can divorce yourself from the situation:

If a situation or activity doesn’t give you joy, you are free to avoid it. If you don’t enjoy meeting your in-laws, don’t prevent your spouse from meeting his or her family. Simply excuse yourself from such situations.

No one relationship is perfect, but you can make it the best possible with a little bit of effort.

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All images courtesy Pixabay

Dr Prerna Kohli, India's leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

7 Tips to build positive relationships

Homo Sapiens are created in a way that we co-exist in sync with each other. And we feel happy, healthy and content when we are surrounded by positive and supportive relationships. A close relationship with another person is one of the earnest occurrences for someone.

Dr Prerna Kohli, India's leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships
Dr Prerna Kohli, India’s leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships

Here are few tips to inculcate to have fruitful relationships in life:

Communicate

Communication in a relationship means understanding. It is essential to be careful with our assumptions when it comes to delivering your thoughts. Poor communication can lead to a high level of stress. Make sure your words are clear and not confusing, otherwise the consequences can mislead the person the other end.

Accept others

No two people are exactly the same. Their behaviors, actions, and reactions vary. Our perceptions also differ from one another. One of the major barriers that we face while building a healthy relationship is our different attitudes. We should learn to accept the other person for who they are and celebrate the differences. Because life would be insipid if we are all same.

Trust others

At times, because of past experiences, we hesitate to let others be a part of our life. This habit of not letting the others in create issues. Trusting the other shows your respect towards them, hence making it an essential factor.

Support and Appreciate

A supportive friend or a partner makes a huge difference in life. When we are amongst people who love and support us and appreciate us for our achievements, we tend to be more passionate and happy. But remember, as much as appreciation is needed for a smooth run, sincere opinion or feedback are important equally.

Give your time

Dr Prerna Kohli, India's leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships
Dr Prerna Kohli, India’s leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships

More than investing in presents and gifts invest your time in people. Spend some uninterrupted time with your friends and family. With the advancements in technology and various applications that connect us 24 x 7, we have become handicapped when it comes to in-person interactions. Be emotionally and mentally present where you are physically present.

Listen

A lot of people listen with an intention to reply than to actually listen. When we genuinely listen to someone we make them feel wanted. This enhances their self-esteem and makes them feel valued.

Be Empathetic

Dr Prerna Kohli, India's leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships
Dr Prerna Kohli, India’s leading psychologist shares tips to build positive relationships

Your words can be forgotten, but how you made the other person can never be forgotten. We should make efforts to relate to the others and understand them, to build positive relationships.

Remember treat others how you want to be treated!

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Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

What happens when a toxic relationship ends?

At the end of an emotionally abusive relationship, you might feel burdened with inconclusive thoughts and overwhelming emotions. And this is absolutely acceptable. While your friends and family feel thankful for your break-up, they may not be able to understand the emotional turmoil going inside your heart and brain. But you should not carry on with toxic relationship

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends

Let’s look at the end of an abusive relationship from the following aspects:

Mental and Emotional Health

Post being dumped by the person whom you considered to be your one and only soul mate, you might go through a roller coaster of emotions. The symptoms are often similar to that of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.
There might not be any visible scars to make it obvious that you are hurt, but the pain is similar to that of a physical injury.
You might even show obsessive behaviour, where you constantly think about your ex, your break up.
The more the covert these symptoms are, the more damage it can do to your emotional stability and the ability to overcome the trauma.

Attachment or Addiction?

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends

When two people part their ways in a healthy way, they may feel hurt, but it does not take a psychological toll on the two persons involved. They eventually move on as a practical approach was followed to end the relationship. But in an emotionally abusive relationship, the break up isn’t as clean, rather the abuser is manipulative.
The victim might not recognize signs and develop an emotional attachment towards them.
You might re-run the events from your relationship in your mind several times throughout the day or read the old conversations.
Being with a person becomes addictive over a period of time, like an unhealthy attachment. It might seem normal and justified to the victim, but this really hampers their emotional well-being.

Moving on!

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends

The first step to moving on is to accept your situation. A few things that you could do to overcome such a relationship are:

Take care of your emotions

Repairing your emotions requires great efforts. When you get abandoned by someone you are so addicted to, it affects your self-esteem negatively. You can feel used and discarded, angry and isolated. Instead of suppressing and being a home to them, it is very important that you accept and acknowledge your emotions. Recognize how you feel. You can make a journal about the same. If you feel like crying or screaming, do that.

Pen it down

At times it might be difficult for you to talk about your broken relationship and what all you went through in that. But it is important to express in order to heal. To start with, you can keep a journal of your thoughts and emotions, gradually opening up about it verbally.

Confide in Close ones

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends

You can always count on your close friends and families when you feel the need to. Surround yourself with people. Avoid isolating yourself with your thoughts all the time.

Cut-off contact with the abuser

You need to cut off the contact with your ex. Being vulnerable might drag you to his doors, but this would be unhealthy. It is important to maintain a distance when you part ways with your abuser. You may feel a pull towards him, but remember it is unhealthy for your mental health if you remain connected to him.

Do not stalk

It may seem like a nice idea to keep a tab on your ex by stalking him on social media or keeping in touch with his friends. But this is not ideal. You must focus investing your time and energy on yourself rather than knowing about his whereabouts.

Postpone important decisions

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about what happens after a toxic relationship ends

In the times, when you are emotionally unstable it is better to not make any important life decisions, which may affect your future. Let yourself feel and heal for some time first.

Practice patience

For a physical injury to heal there is always a defined set of medicines and treatment method that one follows and gets okay. But for an emotional setback, you need to give yourself time. Every person takes their own time to get out of an emotional difficulty. Focus on your progress.

Seek Help

If your emotions are way out of control and are hindering with your daily life, you should seek for some professional help. In the times, when we are vulnerable, we might not be in the right state of mind to be emotionally efficient. A bit of advice about situation and lifestyle changes by a professional can prove to be of great help.

Are you in a healthy relationship? Have you been a victim of emotional abuse?

Call us for 15 minutes of free counselling at +91=9069069069.

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about Supreme Court verdict on Section 377

BY: Dr. Prerna Kohli

Defeating the prejudice, Embracing Equality

September 06, 2018, will mark an important day for the LGBT community in India. The Supreme Court of India abolished Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code (IPC).  This law came into effect in the year 1982. It stated that the carnal intercourse against the order of nature with man, woman or animal was punishable with imprisonment of a lifetime or at least 10 years of jail, with or without fine.

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about Supreme Court verdict on Section 377
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about the Supreme Court verdict on Section 377

Today’s judgment symbolizes the beginning of unbiased treatment for the LGBTQ community in our country. For a very long time, the community has been harassed and struggled. They had been treated as the discarded sections, always. But the decision of abolishing Section 377 is a huge initiation in terms of equality.

Chief justice Dipak Misra and Justices DY Chandrachud, AM Khanwilkar, Indu Malhotra, and Rohinton Fali Nariman decreed that LGBTQ community will now have the same sexual rights just like everyone else.

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about Supreme Court verdict on Section 377
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about the Supreme Court verdict on Section 377

The Journey

In 2009, Delhi High court had declared that any consensual sexual act between homosexuals in private is not illegal. But later, Justice G S Singhvi did not validate the decision and said that it is on the members of Parliament to make any decision on the topic.

However, in April 2014, the Supreme Court suggested the government to declare transgender as the third sex and should be able to practice all the rights under the law and also asked the community in the OBC category. Naz Foundation in April 2016 filed a petition and the Chief Justice, TS Thakur decided to review the same along with a constitutional bench of 5 other members.

The Verdict

Finally, following the small steps over the time, here is the decision, taken for the welfare of the LGBTQ community. From the common man to the United Nations, everyone is praising the decision. There is a wave of happiness all over the country.

Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about Supreme Court verdict on Section 377
Dr Prerna Kohli India’s Top Psychologist talks about the Supreme Court verdict on Section 377

The Psychological Benefits of the verdict

The verdict is the right step in the direction of equality as there will be no victimization or labelling of any alternate sexuality. This might not end discrimination totally, but this will open the doors of acceptance for people of the LGBT community. The harassment and blackmailing of the gay people will stop, which had actually been one of the major reasons in the past for them to remain in the closet. The homosexuals who married the opposite sex due to the stigma can come out now, ending their unhappy marriages.

Accepting others for who they are is the biggest support one can give each other. Sexuality is not an acquired trait, its very much natural.

All the protests and demonstrations finally end in a fruitful result. From here on, there will be hearts full of love and heads held up high with pride.

Learn more about Dr. Prerna Kohli

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