Blog

What are the Personality Disorders?

You would be suffering from a Personality Disorder if you have unhealthy and rigid patterns of Thinking, behaving and functioning. It is difficult to diagnose if you have a personality disorder because the way you behave and think is very natural to you. Since,You often find that the problems you have to face are due to other people around you and not due to your specific actions. Hence,You find it difficult to adjust to your work and interpersonal relationships.

These are relatively permanent patterns in the way you behave and experience inner emotions. The pattern is seen in areas of your thoughts, emotions, interpersonal functioning and impulse management.

What is Narcissistic Personality Disorder(NPD)?

The classic description of NPD in one word is the pattern of “Grandiosity”, either in behavior or fantasy. You will have a longing desire for admiration from everyone and a complete absence of empathy towards other people. If you suffer from NPD, you will have an unshakable belief about your being of primary importance to anyone and everyone you meet.

People with NPD  generally have patronizing and snobbish attitudes. If you find yourself or a friend of yours complain about most of the people around themselves and finds faults about them; It could be an indication of NPD.

People with this Personality disorder believe that they are superior or special and like to bond with others who they believe are unique and special. When they associate with special people,their self-esteem is boosted, which is generally fragile in their cases. In addition,people with NPD cannot stand criticism or rejection in any form.

Specific symptoms of NPD

• You feel yourself to be “Very Important”
• Fantasizing about power, success, beauty, ideal romance or Intelligence
• You believe yourself to be unique and hence can only be understood by a few special people
• Need constant admiration and attention from others
• You always have unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment from others
•  Do not hesitate to take advantage of others to reach your goals
• You have no empathy for the feelings of other people
•  Think others are jealous of you and You are jealous of others
• You always show an arrogant attitude and behavior

Possible causes and Treatment

The cause of NPD, like most of the personality disorders, are not very clear and absolute;However, But both genetic and environmental factors are responsible for the development of this condition. Early life experiences play a major role.

Hence, Treatment of NPD is difficult due to the pervasive underlying low self-esteem and hence the defensiveness and projected grandiosity. Also, It is very difficult for such people to acknowledge vulnerability. Although, Individual Therapy and Group Therapy can help them in relating to others in a more empathetic way and understand their patterns of behavior.

Learn More about Dr Prerna Kohli

Pregnancy is the first and foremost step for women entering motherhood. She realises that she is carrying someone inside her. It becomes a joyous occasion for the parents of the unborn child. But, along with pregnancy comes various physical and mental health issues.

It is normal to be worried about your pregnancy, and how it is affecting your body. It brings out different physical and hormonal change for the person. Thus, affecting the mood of the person. Due to which the person faces various mental health issues.

Thus, below are few Mental Health Issues Related to Pregnancy:

Depression:

During pregnancy, a lot of women suffer from depression. There are certain body changes which the woman is unable to understand or process. Also, depression can happen because of the surroundings and circumstances.

Stress and Anxiety:

It is general to feel a bit stressed while you are pregnant. But, the woman starts taking extreme stress because of the unknown which induces anxiety. Sometimes, the combination of anxiety and stress lead to panic attacks.

Bi-Polar Disorder:

Very few women face bipolar illness during pregnancy but it still happens. It happens because of the hormonal changes as well as the mental change. Which then increases the range of mood swings to depressed to manic. But, it is also to note that pregnancy induces a certain level of mood swings. But, a person who is suffering from bipolar disorder will show frequent and extreme mood swings. Read More about Bi-Polar Disorder.

These problems can occur because of the reasons mentioned below:

• Past history of any mental health problem.
• Feeling that you lack support from your surroundings.
• Having an unstable relationship with your spouse or your environment.
• Currently going through abuse or any past experience of abuse.
• Addiction to any kinds of drugs, alcohol or nicotine.

When you are pregnant it is always advisable to keep a check on your mental health. There may be times where you are feeling of ups and downs. Seeking a mental health professional is not a sign of weakness.

Below are the symptoms you can look out for to know it is time to seek a mental health professional:

Feeling Sad Constantly:

As mentioned above, feelings of ups and downs will occur during pregnancy. But, if you are constantly feeling down for more than 2 weeks, it is advisable to seek counselling.

Unable to Function:

If negative thoughts and feelings are constantly plaguing your mind. Hence, you are not able to function or do your daily work.

Symptoms of Depression:

If you are showing signs and symptoms of depression like loss of interest or hopelessness. You can read more about the symptoms of depression here.

Anxious/Worried:

You are constantly feeling anxious or worried about something or the other most of the times.

Symptoms of OCD:

You are constantly plagued by negative thoughts inside your head and to stop them you are indulging in the same activity over and over again.

Accepting help from others is not a sign of weakness. Counselling can help in various other ways, which will make the experience of childbirth a smooth and happy process. Also, if you or someone you know is suffering from any of the above symptoms then please visit a mental health professional immediately.

Learn more about Dr Prerna Kohli

Living in a happy relationship doesn’t mean that there is no scope for improvement. Also, the relationship doesn’t only mean a relationship with your spouse or your partner. It includes the relationships which surround you, be it in the office, home or your friends.

To build construct your own self-confidence you need to make other people feel valued and important.

Thus, below are few behaviours to improve your relationships with others:

Give Attention:

Everyone likes attention. Also, the best way to show someone that you are paying attention to them is by listening to them very carefully. If you start listening to them and asking about things they are talking about they will feel that they are valued. Thus, showing them that they are interesting and you interested in whatever they are saying.

Accepting Them:

In between two people, acceptance is very important. Accepting the other makes the person feel comfortable around you. Especially when the acceptance is genuine. Thus, increasing the self-esteem of the person and feeling safe in your company.

Smile Often:

A simple genuine smile can make anyone happy. It makes you look attractive as well. Hence, when you smile at a person, the person feels valued and feels good from inside. Also, in this process, you raise your own self-esteem as you raise others. Thus, costing you nothing and bringing everyone closer to you.

Show Gratitude:

Gratitude is one of the biggest virtue a person can have. It shows that you respect and appreciate what the other has done. Also, it gives out the message that you value the person and their effort. Hence, increasing their self-worth and self-esteem. Thus, adding a small “thank you” to anyone who is helping you or giving you anything, brings out your positive image and your relationship with everyone around you increases.

Encourage them:

Often more than less, we forget to encourage or praise people for their achievements. We overlook what they have done and continue to do our own work. Thus, making them feel not wanted. Hence, it is important to encourage and appreciate people around you. They will feel that they are a part of your life. Thus, improving your relationships with them.

Compliment them:

Most of the times we waste our energy on criticizing other people. Hence, we forget to compliment them. Complimenting anyone can raise their self-esteem and boost their confidence. Thus, they will start appreciating you and valuing more in their life which will lead to an improvement in your relationships and your surroundings.

Reach out to them:

Most of the time we spend is on keeping tabs on who called us and who hasn’t. Hence, because of this, we lose out most of our relationships. So, instead of keeping tabs on what your close ones have done for you or haven’t, it is always a better option to reach out to them first. Sometimes, it only takes the first step.

The above-mentioned ways will improve your relationship instantly. People around you will find more attractive and would want to spend more time with you. Thus, helping you to better your relationships. But, if you face constant trouble in any of your relationships, you can always reach out for help. Seeking for help is not something to be afraid of. Hence, if you or someone you know is facing trouble in their relationship then please visit a counsellor immediately.

Read our other blog on Ways to Become More attractive.

Learn More about Dr Prerna Kohli

Being a parent is a hectic task but, it is something which comes as a responsibility for them. Many of them love being a parent. But, they always wonder how can they be better at what they are doing. Also, along with being a parent comes conflicts of emotions and ideas. With all these, the parents start to wonder what they should do.

Hence, below are 7 ways on how to become a better parent:

1. Don’t Compare:

Firstly, it is very important that you shouldn’t compare your kids. That is, you should not point out who is doing better and who is not. Comparison increases the stress on your children. Also, they start to feel that only achievement can win your love for them. Hence, they either start to detach themselves from you or they start to take an excess of pressure.

2. Do What You Say:

Children learn the most from their parents. Hence, it is important you teach them the same. Many times we teach our children something and then we do the opposite in front of them. This way the child learns to lie as well as they do not actually learn what you have taught. Hence, it is very important to do what you tell them to do. Thus, helping them learn the good things.

3. Let Them Make Mistakes:

Our initial reaction towards anything they are doing wrong is to stop them and tell them. For example, if your child is playing with a car and you know that the car will break down, you would immediately go and stop him/her from doing so and explain to him/her. Instead of this, if you allow them to make mistakes they will learn about how to correct the mistakes much faster. But, make sure the mistakes they are making are not harming them. That is, playing with electrical wires or fiddling with any machine which can harm them.

4. Let them be Bored:

Often when we see our child is getting bored, we indulge them in some activity or the other. You might think that this will enhance their skills, but in reality, they do not find the time to be alone with their thoughts. Thus, it is important to let them be bored. If they are bored, they will start indulging in their fantasies and stories. Hence, improving their ability to think and wonder as well as understanding themselves. Sometimes they might need temptations to indulge. So you can keep toys or colouring books or cardboard boxes lying around them. Hence, able to indulge their energy positively.

5. Don’t Comfort or Calm Them with Food:

It is a tendency in parents to reward the child with a food they like. But, it shouldn’t be done. There is a simple reason behind it. If the child is praised every time he/she does something good with food, then your love and attention will be replaced by food. A child only asks for your attention and love. Hence, if you replace that with food then the child would only move towards materialistic gains. You can reward them with food only when it is absolutely necessary, and they will also enjoy that. But, food should not replace hugs and kisses from you, and the love and attention they seek.

6. Teach Them How to Manage their Emotions:

Most of the times we see our children behaving in very aggressive manner. We deem that behaviour as misconduct and punish them all the time. But, most of the time it happens because they are unable to manage their emotions. Hence, it is important to teach them how to manage their emotions. The best way to do so is to have conversations with them and make them realise what they have done how it affects others, in a calm manner.

7. Embrace Change:

One thing which will happen with you and your children is change. They will start disliking the activity they used to love, or they will try and find new and different activities. This is just a normal behaviour. As they grow older, they will change in height, weight as well as in emotions. But, along with it you also need to see that they don’t lose interest in all the activities and start becoming depressed.

All of the above tips can help you learn parenting better. But, it is also important to opt for pre-birth counselling. Especially, if it is your first child. Also, if you think that your child is becoming depressed or appear stressed all the time, you should visit a child counsellor immediately.

Learn More about Dr Prerna Kohli

Falling in love or entering into a relationship is a beautiful experience in itself. But, it hurts a lot when the other breaks-up. A recent study has shown that break-ups in teenagers and young adults are one of the biggest reasons for depression in them. Sometimes, it even leads to suicide as the emotional bond breaks.

Going through a break-up puts a lot of physical and mental stress to the person. Breaking up means destroying an emotional bond, and an attachment which the person has actually made and worked for. A certain intimacy is generated between the couple which is destroyed in an instant. But, that intimacy is not easily removed from the mind. It leaves behind an emotional trace, which needs to be healed.

Hence, below are 7 ways to cope up post break-up:

1. Write it:

One of the best ways is to write it down. Suppression of one’s emotions is the most normal response one takes. But, it is not a normal response to fall back to. One needs to feel the emotions, and there are a lot of emotions one feels during a break-up. Expressing one’s anger, sadness, loneliness, feelings of rejection and writing them down, helps with coping. Hence, writing your feelings without any judgement helps a lot.

2. Eat Right:

After a break-up, we start to change our eating patterns. A revenge mode comes up, or we start to eat a lot. Thus, eating our feelings or punishing ourselves. Hence, it is important to eat a proper well-maintained diet, without changing our dietary schedules. Eating a protein-rich and high fibre diet helps in elevation of mood. Indulging in junk food or skipping meals will harm your body a lot.

3. Exercise:

After a break-up, there is a tendency to sit at home and cry a lot or wallow in sadness. Or, another reaction which happens is to over-exercise. But, both of these coping mechanisms damage your own health. Post break up, it is important to do good cardio exercises. This way, your body is in motion and the mind is getting refreshed. Also, exercising releases certain chemicals which lowers body stress levels.

4. Focus on the Positives:

When someone goes through a loss, there are a lot of emotions which one goes through. But, most of these emotions are negative. Thus, making it difficult to focus on the positive emotions, hence restricting your view and perspective to only the negatives. The best way to focus on the positives is to keep a “positive journal”. In the journal, you can write things which actually happened positive for you that day. At the start, you might have to think very hard, but slowly the negatives will lift off, and it will become easier for you to focus on the positives.

5. Do thinks YOU love to do:

It is hard to resume things you loved to do post-breakup. But, it is important to resume them. Indulging in things you liked to do, will start making you feel happy. It can be going out with your friends for a cup of coffee, or even binge-watching a comedy TV show with your friends. Laughing and self-care will help you cope up with your emotions better. Thus, doing things you love to do will help you love yourself.

6. Use a “Timer” to Rant:

It is natural after a break-up that you start thinking about your ex or constantly talk about them to your friends for months or weeks. Thus, finding the obsession with their thoughts uncontrollable. But, it can be stopped. To stop it, you can set aside a particular “timer” for yourself. This time can be 5 minutes a day or 10 minutes a day. In this time, you can talk or rant or write all you want to talk about your ex, but when the timer goes out, you need to say yourself stop. After this, you will tell yourself that now you will talk about the person tomorrow. Then, slowly over time reducing the timer. Hence, helping yourself getting over obsessive thoughts about them.

7. Give to Others:

Helping others and giving back to others makes us feel better about ourselves. Thus, helping us find our own self-worth and smile. Thus, one of the best ways to cope up after a break-up is to give others and present others with your love.

Sometimes, these things are not enough and the world feels a very sad place. After going through a break-up, symptoms of depression might come up. Hence, if you or your friend seems to be going through a break-up and you want someone to talk to, you can always choose counselling and therapy as an option.

To know more about Dr Prerna Kohli